A Grief Observed

 C.S. Lewis wrote a collection of reflections on the experience of bereavement following the death of his wife in 1960.  These reflections were put in a book, “A Grief Observed,” which was published in 1961.  

Here are some of my rambling reflections at this moment.  

I have found comfort in my own experience of bereavement from the many who have called, sent cards, notes, and letters expressing their love for Cher and their concern for me.  Thank you so much.

I’ve also found comfort in the words of others.  Frederick Buechner’s  words in The Sacred Journey have been a tremendous help:  

“Whenever and however else they may have come to life (since they left us), it

is beyond doubt that they live still in us.  Death can never put an end to our 

relationship with them.  Memory is more than looking back to a time that is no

longer; it is a looking out into another kind of time altogether where everything

that ever was continues not just to be, but to grow and change with the life that

still is.”

The famous sermon by Arthur John Gossip, “When Life Tumbles In, What Then?” which I’ve read and commented on so many times through the years speaks to me now as it never spoke before. 

The hymns of the Christian faith have been helpful, too.  Cher asked that the hymn, “Abide With Me,” be played at her Celebration of Life service.  The words come alive for me in a new way as I listen to Susan Boyle sing them. You can find her rendition on YouTube.  The last nine words keep ringing in my head:  “In life, in death, O Lord, abide with me.”

Wherever we traveled around this wonderful world, Cher would always do a little dance for the camera.  She danced in New Orleans, in Spain, Italy, Greece, and at the ancient pyramids of Egypt—almost everywhere we visited.  The photo shows her dancing in St. Petersburg, Russia in 2009.   I am comforted by the words of the hymn, “Lord of the Dance:” and its refrain:  “Dance, then, wherever you may be (France, Austria, England—wherever); I am the Lord of the Dance, said He.  And I’ll lead you all wherever you may be (in joy, in sorrow—wherever, whatever), and I’ll lead you all in the dance, said He.”  Which calls to mind another hymn that I trust speaks true: “Guide me, O thou great Jehovah, pilgrim through this barren land…I am weak, but thou art mighty; hold me with thy powerful hand.”